My First Blog

So this is my first blog, please be patient with me. I am a single mom of a wonderful daughter, the "grandmother" of an almost perfect dog. I am a License Massage Therapist and Love my job. I took time away from massage (long story) but now am doing massage full time. The women I work with are amazing, and I love going to work. I've been separated for @ 2 years and will FINALLY have my divorce papers neat month. We recently moved back to my hometown and things are just falling into place for our little family. My main focuses for now are getting my massage clientele set, Regen situated and doing well, and finding my groove in life again. Dating??? Who knows...I feel ready but no one seems ready for me. I guess I am not really good at the dating around thing; I would just like to find someone, click, and build from there. Ya I know...it takes time.Well there is my start at blogging..more to fallow..would love any responses.

Memorial Day

Today is Memorial day..while at church names of member that have passed on were announced. This got me to thinking of all those I love that have also passed on, hopefully to some kind of Heaven. My parents are a loss I feel daily, but I realized that my other losses have colored my life more than I ever really noticed. Slowly from the age of 16 my family have moved on. Now it's basiclly me and Regen that make up our family tree. I loved them all in different ways, and the loss of these people has in some ways made me too independent, too guarded. I have amazing people in my life, but few are really allowed into my heart, the loss of most would not truly damage me, I have closed them off, for fear of their loss. I also thought of the saying " God never gives you more than you can handle". I truly pray that God knows that I could not handle the loss of Regen!! This is my greatest fear; it puts me into a cold sweat and makes my heart race to even write of it. Anyway, I realized that I need to loosen up the guards around my life and let others see more of who I am. Life is more fulfilling when you have others to share it with. At least that's what I've been told.