What life gives you...

I have always wanted more kids...at least two in total. But when I was married, my husband never wanted more, he would say " Yes, we'll have another" then belittle and berate me for wanting another. When I was pregnant with Regen he even told me that if I got pregnant again he expected me to have an abortion. So one child it was. After my divorce I thought I will be able to have more kids! But as time passed, I didn't find a new partner so I thought of having another on my own. I looked into adoption, nope to much $$ and no single women. I looked into AI with a fetus, but again too much $$, and I really want a kid of "me" if I am going to carry it. So after the last 5 years I came to terms recently that I would be "Mom" to Regen only. That our family would just be us, it be small but well loved. Then two weeks ago I found out I was pregnant! I am happy in so many ways, I get to have another child, Regen gets to be a big sister, and our family will grow! The dad is not my partner, but a man I have known for years and once loved very deeply. He will be around and be a good dad, so in that I am happy. I do wish though, that I had a partner that I loved and that loved me, so we could be a small but loving family with a man in the mix. I would love for this child to have a dad that was with it's mom, a man to help Regen get over her fears and uneasiness with men. To show both kids that a dad can love his children, protect them, and let them grow into themselves, (not a molded example of what adults want them to be )...that a dad can be just as fierce with love and caring as a mom. But as they say you have to take what life gives you and make the most of it........so here is to wonderfully sweet refreshing lemonade!!!!